Second Thoughts
I was always aprehensive about whether or not I would be able to handle patients dying. Would I be emotionally strong enough, especially after my father died of mesothelioma 3 years ago.
Well, today, a close friend also died of cancer, and I was not even sure I could handle the whole experience again. She has been ill for the last two years, and four week ago, she was given six weeks to live, up until Friday, she was happily sitting up at home, and just last week we had a hearty dinner with her. It all happens so suddenly, one is hardly prepared.
We always find a death easy to handle, until it is someone we know, today, it was more the way the whole situation reminded me of my fathers death and his memory that I found hard to bare. It seemed almost parallel, I never would have thought that before I turned 19 I would see two deaths. For the first time I cried in front of my Mother, they were tears for my Father, just as much as they were for my friend, I suppose it was about time I let it out.
Death. It makes you appreciate life more, though I would never wish the experience on anyone, just one message, appreciate your friends and your parents while they are there, or you will forever regret it. Nothing you can do will bring them back, or make up for mistakes you may have made with them in the past, now is the time to forgive and forget, as well as say sorry, or just say,"I love you". I know this experience was hard on me, but it has definitely strengthened my conviction that I have chosen the right profession, to save even one person from the pain that my Mother and I have gone through, will have been well worth the effort. I know people will die under my care, but it is the ones who live whom I should concentrate on while I am working towards my degree, and perhaps am having some second thoughts.
RIP Asha, I will always remember you the way you were.
Well, today, a close friend also died of cancer, and I was not even sure I could handle the whole experience again. She has been ill for the last two years, and four week ago, she was given six weeks to live, up until Friday, she was happily sitting up at home, and just last week we had a hearty dinner with her. It all happens so suddenly, one is hardly prepared.
We always find a death easy to handle, until it is someone we know, today, it was more the way the whole situation reminded me of my fathers death and his memory that I found hard to bare. It seemed almost parallel, I never would have thought that before I turned 19 I would see two deaths. For the first time I cried in front of my Mother, they were tears for my Father, just as much as they were for my friend, I suppose it was about time I let it out.
Death. It makes you appreciate life more, though I would never wish the experience on anyone, just one message, appreciate your friends and your parents while they are there, or you will forever regret it. Nothing you can do will bring them back, or make up for mistakes you may have made with them in the past, now is the time to forgive and forget, as well as say sorry, or just say,"I love you". I know this experience was hard on me, but it has definitely strengthened my conviction that I have chosen the right profession, to save even one person from the pain that my Mother and I have gone through, will have been well worth the effort. I know people will die under my care, but it is the ones who live whom I should concentrate on while I am working towards my degree, and perhaps am having some second thoughts.
RIP Asha, I will always remember you the way you were.
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